July 30th, 2006 - Thoughts on a Sunday Service

So much is happening this Sunday that I will not be able to describe because I cannot participate. I am on call at work today. The Oregon Zoo has a travelling show of animals after the service and Spoke Folk, young people who are touring the country on their bikes, are having a parade and a potluck dinner this evening.

Also, Creator has Bethany Hartung in our prayers. She had a recurrence of leukemia after being in remission for almost 2 years. Bethany began chemo on July 27th and Toni asked we pray that her body can handle the medicine, that her kidneys don't shut down and she will tolerate it well.

Toni, Rick, and the entire Hartung family have revealed the depth of their character to members of Creator over the years. There is always warmth and a smile for everyone. Toni pulls many things together, as far as activities for the church, and organizes as part of her work, but she always finds time to create a moment to center and deepen friendships. Toni, Rick, and their family have a graciousness and hospitality together with a deep respect and love for the neighborhood. There is a joy for living that they pass along to all those they greet when we meet.

Many at Creator are praying intensely that all goes well with Bethany. I will miss an update on her progress today.

There are a number of reasons I would have liked to have attended today but, in any case, not attending Sunday service is a letdown. There’s a feeling of being out of kilter. Pinpointing why is difficult, yet today something compels me to try.

Perhaps a place to start would be with a story Elie Wiesel tells of a great Hasidic rabbi, when the great man was but a young boy studying in the local yeshiva. The teacher noticed that the lad was occasionally absent from the classroom where he was studying Torah. Finally, one day, the teacher followed the boy into the surrounding woods where he discovered the rabbi-to-be praying. What are you doing?" he asked. The boy replied, "Praying." "But why do you come all the way out here to pray," the teacher pressed. "Don't you know that everywhere God is the same?" "Oh, yes," the lad replied, "God is everywhere the same. . . but I am not."

There is something about being deliberate in going to worship and building a habit of worship that changes something within me. For many years I saw no particular value in making worship a habit. My reliance fell more on individual spiritual moments that came from reading or discovering spiritual truths while following creative pursuits. Worship has not turned me away from this course, but has led me to a deeper knowledge of ways to move to new understandings.

We talked about living sacrifices in our bible study at Paul and Debi’s. Something my wife said before that study, as we discussed the verse, made me understand worship is part of the living sacrifice we can make in our daily life. Yet this living sacrifice leads to a God given joy. It is like choosing to become part of another dance between your soul and God.

What are the components of this particular dance? I want to answer this question and simultaneously answer a question Pastor Fred asked a couple months back about the church and why Creator specifically works in our lives.

Being a member of a church is about belonging to a community of faith who struggle (or dance) with faith in daily life. Also, for me, it is an important act of obedience with the commandment to remember the Sabbath and keep it holy. I know some would say I am hypocritical in not keeping the Sabbath day holy by being on call. I do struggle with that as well as to defining work and defining how I keep a day holy. It is an ongoing progression in my life to understand sacred time and how to invoke and/or keep it.

Hearing and reading more of the bible easily comes because of worship. There is a different perspective of understanding God in my life and there are insights into how believers struggled in the past with their faith. I think back to Dante’s vision of Paradise; how we are all pages in God’s book and every page is holy and needed as a path to God. Together with this each service reaffirms artistic and creative expressions of faith in the music, the environment in the sanctuary and the furnishings of our worship space, all intended to engage us in an ongoing relationship with God. We are provided the opportunity to use our gifts.

There is a life rooted in the structure of worship and the church year which can only be reinforced by worship. Acknowledging and confessing my sins is something I need help with and the structure of the service helps. The service provides a structure to help me meditate on being a part of doing God’s will on earth and is a weekly reminder of God's love for us and through us.

The church year connects worshippers to cultural traditions and provides a structure for deeper meditation on life. The church year connects me to who I was when I experienced a church season in the past. It provides an opportunity to remember those who are no longer in the immediate Creator circle of worshipping and let's us re-engage with those who are.

In the past worship felt too confining to me. It had become another responsibility, a point that people would use to judge if you were a "good" person.

Worship and going to church isn't that today for me. It is an opportunity to dive into a spiritual life, like what a diving board provides for us to dive into the water. The side of the pool is available but the purpose of the diving board is to make the jump easier and supports the attempt being made.